Well, It’s one of the famous from Yuna, and honestly one of the song that describe about me very well.

Tak semua kau rancang akan berlaku
Mungkin nasib tak menyebelahi aku
Entah mengapa engkau yang aku cinta
Mungkin lebih baik kau ku lepas saja

That part reminds me how confused I am, when a world ‘cinta’ come to my life. I so confused, either my feelings are all just because being manipulated with all the cinta cintun movie thingy, or it’s just a pure love – which I don’t even know is it true exist?

Dan aku memang penakut
Mengakui cinta kepadamu
Seribu kali ku cuba ucapkan
Bila bersamamu
Kau bukan milikku
Dan engkau pun tahu
Kau? bukan milikku

Yeah, this part kills me. Cuz’ it’s not easy to explain, to comfort, to be fair with person who deeply in love with us – so loyal and true, a person who makes us crazy cuz we’re so closed together before – now everything just torn apart, and to tell myself the fact that me and that person cannot be together.

Semalam termimpi something yang agak pelik.

Aku mimpi, aku tengah pangku anak lelaki, around age 3 – 7 something. I take him from his mom, which aku tak nampak muka siapa. Then, having fun with this cute little boy naik motor pusing-pusing ..err i don’t know, kampung maybe? Then we’re sleep togather, and aku siap peluk dia ketat-ketat takmau lepas.

Oh myyy apa jadah mimpi aku kali ni! HAHAHA. For u guys info, since past 6 months aku tak pernah ingat apa aku mimpi, and i don’t even recalled any dreams. They said perhaps I stress up with so many things and tak boleh mimpi. Now, habis diploma, aku mimpi bukan-bukan pulak.

Deyumm. Adekah aku… jeng jengg HAHAHA #blushing

Tapi everyone knows how awkward myself when handling babies or children. Yeah, i am sucks at it. I turn out cold tetibe. -.-” Adekah mimpi sebenarnya kenyataan yang diterbalikkan? #nanges

Nak ada anak sendiri. kbye

P/s – Well, it’s really sweet dreams. really.

Being me at this moment,perhaps some people might went mental, or give up. Marketing life seriously tough, based from what I’ve been thru all this three months.

Well, as an example – when the last time you saw your family? Everyday, I’ll woke up late around 9, and go to work 20mins later. No one around, everyone goes to work, and my brother to his school. Then at the midnight around 12 am or 2 am, balik rumah – everyone tido.

The last conversation with my mum perhaps few days before, waktu pagi. Pagi-pagi dia ajak borak suruh aku check kad topup dia mamat econsave tu tipu. Dia suruh aku backup. Aku ha’ah kan je sebab sleepy gila. Pastu aku tak ingat apa dah. bangun je sume orang dah keluar pergi kerja.

While the last time I talked with my father, last weekend kot? Pasal aku nak keluar pergi mana. Then krik krik?

My sister? She’s trying to call me but I am too busy with too many things and forget to call her back. The last we talk perhaps last weekend, she’s ask my opinion about her kad jemputan since she’s planning to kahwin this Mei, insya’allah. Hurm.

Last but not least, my lil brother. The last time we talk, I asked him last three days to close the fan cuz its too cold.

I dont have any reasons to defend myself. But that’s how my life rolling, balik lewat, bangun lambat. -.-

Tadi meeting ala warung sebab bos belanja makan, sambil cecite apa masalah kiteorang sebenarnya.

So aku pun cakap pongpang pasal sales.

..tapi tu bukan benda nak cite.

Tetibe bos random suruh aku cakap cina. Maybe sebab customer & dealer datang selalu cakap cina dengan aku.

Sorry bukan reka cite, aku yang gelap ni orang ingat cina #eksyen.

So aku cakap aku tengah belajar, just a simple sentence je.

And kau tahu dia cakap apa?

“Tak guna belajar, you kena confident je cakap cina dengan sape-sape.Belajar banyak pun tak guna”

HAHA!

sentak kejap. gila kool nasihat bos aku. Aku tak pernah jumpe orang nasihat aku ala-ala makan dalam camni.

..one day akan boleh cakap cina! #tetiba

Aku hari tu gatal pergi google nama sendiri kat google image, then tahu apa kua?

Gambar pose bangang aku few years back! HAHAHAHAHAHAHA!

Pastu aku rasa nak delete, sebab malu.

Tapi pikir balik, kenapa nak buang yang lama, sedangkan itu aku? -.-”

Kelakar sebenarnya bila kita baca post sendiri yang lepas-lepas. Masya’allah punyalah kekwat, perasan, budget sume adalah! HAHA.

Well kadang2 menyesal jugak tapi benda dah lepas, tapi benda tu buat aku terkenang-kenang. Nak melangkah ke depan takutnya nak carik risiko.

kenapa aku ni -.-”

P/s – Dah masuk bulan ke-3 kerja. Raya cina pergi kelantan. 12 result muet, 31 result kemasukan degree UiTM. Ya Allah, permudahkan urusanku. Amin.

I have few weaknesses, yang sometimes aku rasa ‘cannot go lah’ cuz it’s seems not right, not normal.

1) I dont like any separation like losing friends sebab personal reasons or sebab seremeh berhenti kerja. HAHA!

2) i cannot being bad mood longer then 2 hours. HAHA! I still can laugh although it’s imposibble for normal people to laugh at that time. (exams, funeral, etc)

3) Terbawak-bawak bila habis tengok citer yang mellow mellow ni. cit.

4) Duit.. huwaaa #nanges

-.-”

Bila kehilangan, baru kita rasa betapa pentingnya orang tu pada kita.

1st day kerja without Farah, rasa sangat sedih. i mean sangat sangat sedih. There’s no one to talk to, there’s no one to crack jokes and laughing like hell. Now here I am, alone at the counter, like tunggul.

Rasa nak berhenti jugak. Just realized, all this while aku stay sini sebab Farra. Now, there’s nobody to protect, so aku rasa sudah masa aku blah macam plan asal 3 bulan lalu. Orang gila je stay kompeni ni.

I feel bad, no one can replace her. :’(

She’s the only one that can crack corny jokes with me sampai tahap kuar air mata menanges ketawa..kawan sepak terajang..kawan jerit2 depan kaunter.

Aku akan rindu kau pondan. HAHA. Kau selalu marah aku panggil kau pondan. Sebab kau perempuan? HAHA.

Ah sudahlah farah, benci kau. keji je tinggalkan aku sorang.

Pada aku, setiap tahun sama je, yang beza hanyalah cara. Aku more on Maal Hijrah sebenarnya. Tidaklah alim, tapi aku tak suka and bukan style aku tahun baru sambut bagai nak rak dengan pergi konsert ke apa. Suasana tenang, baca buku, baring-baring ha tu baru aku. HAHA.

2011 meninggalkan banyak memori sebenarnya pada aku. Menyedarkan siapa aku. Being single, hurting people, people being hurt, sentap, sedih, semua tu hanyalah perasa. Sentiasa akan berlaku. But hey, I’ve meet alot of beautiful people along the way. I officially graduate after long three years! Alhamdulillah. Dapat kerja yang okey, gembira.

Berharap 2012 ni, aku nak kerja keras sikit untuk dapat few targets. Nak jadik budak baik sikit, banyakkan sedekah, cuba carik kawan yang alim sket (hee) and yeah, I don’t even know what’s going to be happen Insya’allah if dapat degree nanti. New friends please be nice with me *buat muka kesian* HAHA. Aku nak kumpul harta dari sekarang, so nanti aku nak jadik kaya! #petir tetiba

I am sleepy…and damn tired.

It’s going to be new year lagi dua hari. Resolution? Tak sempat nak pikir.

Kerja 9.30 – 12 pagi sememangnya tough and penat. Sempat tak sempat jela. Muka dah kusam, jerawat, lesu. Benda-benda bodoh macam ni la paling menyampah. Pikir duit punya pasal kan? Pejam mata #nanges TT

Nak online pun tak sempat, makan dengan duit gas jangan citelah, macam air terjun mengalir. Tapi good thing muka aku dah susut sket, hope masuk degree dah boleh feeling2 mongel. Bole? #petir

Nak beli Blackberry yang cikai, tapi budget macam nak simpan. Tapi nak simpan utk apa kan? henset pun tengah takde #tetibe melalut.

Aku penat. Tu je nak cite. kbye -.-